#!/usr/bin/perl 

#################################################
# redirect the point-and-drool masses elsewhere #
#################################################

for ($ENV{HTTP_USER_AGENT}) { 
    $quiplet  = /Mac/            && 'm/Macintrash.html'
		 ||
		/Win(dows )?NT/  && 'e/evilandrude.html'
		 ||
		/Win|MSIE|WebTV/ && 'm/MicroslothWindows.html'
		 ||
		/Amiga/          && 'a/amoeba.html'
		 || 
		/IBM/            && 'i/IBM.html'
		 || 
		/Linux/          && 'l/Linux.html'
		 || 
		/HP-UX/          && 'h/HP-SUX.html'
		 || 
		/SunOS/          && 's/ScumOS.html'
		 || 
		/AIX/            && 'a/AIDX.html'
		 || 
		/SCO/            && 'o/OpenDeathTrap.html'
		 || 
		/VMS/            && 'v/VMS.html'
		 || 
		/OSF/            && 'f/FUDwars.html'
		 || 
		/BSD/            && 'b/BSD.html'
		 || 
		/OS\/?2/          && 'o/OS2.html'
		 || 
		/X11/            && '/u/Unix.html'
		 || 
	     'a/AppendixB.html';
}

printf STDERR "bados: sending %s to %s\n", 
	     $ENV{HTTP_USER_AGENT}, $quiplet;

print "Location: http://www.wins.uva.nl/~mes/jargon/$quiplet\n\n";